Farewell monotony: 7 ideas for getting creative between the sheets
With the passing of time, monotony can take root in your relationship. Don’t worry, there are loads of things you can do to fix it. Read closely and hold onto the ideas which attract you most. Sent it to your partner and let them choose too. Will your choices match? Let’s find out!
Restraint is all about limiting certain movements or senses. Tying hands so they can’t move, blindfolding eyes so they can’t see… all of this belongs to the familiar world of restraints. Of course, you must indulge completely safely, with accessories designed for this purpose and that, if it were necessary, could be removed straight away. If you want to use restraints with your partner and escape dull monotony in bed, you need to communicate really well and fully explore your desires; but above all, you must let your imagination fly. Good sex and eroticism are all about trial and error, and casting aside the stuff you’ve already tried and don’t like is part of the process and a step towards avoiding monotony. And whilst we’re on the topic, expanding the list of practices you both love is also a part. Do you dare give it a go?
Maybe in other situations you have to limit yourself more, but in bed you can be WHOEVER YOU WANT. Escaping the ‘same old same old’ with your partner and some roleplay is seriously exciting, because you can start warming up for it outside of the bed and then continue in it (or not). Invent a story, a character, a desire, and explore your sexuality from there. We won’t lie to you, you don’t always reach the end of this game because the giggles or your real self can take over, but isn’t that what it’s all about: having some fun? Also, the good thing about roleplay is that it’s limitless: Today you could be a newcomer to the neighbourhood, tomorrow a nurse (yes, such a cliché) and then a prison warden with your bedroom as the cell. Whatever next?
Nothing better for escaping the humdrum with your partner than sexting. Let’s be honest, everyone is more daring from behind a screen. Exploring your desires and your sexuality “alone” whilst typing on a device will make you reveal many more fantasies that if you did it face to face. Don’t worry! You will also talk about them (or practise them) face to face, but it will have been much easier to get to that point. At the end of the day, sexing is a turn-on and when two people are really horny, wowee…. they are capable of writing all sorts of exciting stuff! Start slowly, with some suggestive sentences or euphemisms, a slightly racy photo… and from then on, you set the limits where you want.
Using erotic toys will increase the list of “things you can do” to escape monotony. Some men feel threatened by sex toys for women, but they probably don’t realise that there are toys for them too! And, of course, it’s completely fine to share just like any other toy. To choose the best toys to help keep monotony at bay, you need to be clear about what you like and what you don’t like, or at least what you want to explore with your new toy buddy. Perhaps you’re more into vibration, or penetration, or suction…. or maybe you want to try it all! That’s entirely up to you.
Not much is said about the power of these balms, but they really can make the difference between a lousy fuck and a great fuck. And this doesn’t mean that we think that having sex with the same person for a long time leads to bad sex (in fact it tends to be the opposite) but rather that monotony can drag everything down, including desire; and, without desire, sex is doomed to fail. Orgasm enhancers are designed to increase blood flow to the clitoris and, as a result, they provide a warming and mild tingling effect which will drive you wild. After all, in this context the booster triggers a chain of events: Applying the enhancer gets you excited, excitement leads to lubrication and relaxation… and ultimately you find yourself exactly where you want to be but where monotony doesn’t let you go: couple pleasure.
Let’s be clear: not everything you do to banish monotony from your sex life has to end up between the sheets. No, not at all. Very often it’s enough to treasure horny moments and simply have a good time with your partner. Erotic literature is a great exercise for this: it has enormous benefits, it brings quality moments into your relationship, you can explore and revisit fantasies and even start ranking your favourites together. What’s more, reading before going to sleep will leave you both lovely and lustful.
We’re already buying our favourite erotic book. And you?
Adding some variety to what you do in bed can also help you get away from a monotonous sex life. Surely you have a list of fantasies and sexual acts that you still haven’t tried out? If you don’t have such a list, we recommend you make one as you have to start somewhere. Changing up what you do, and mixing the known with the unknown, can become very exciting. Trying new things as a couple will not only enhance your sex life, but also help you know each other even better. If you tend not to stray beyond penetration and, what’s more, one regular position, try some other positions. If you’ve tried them all, try oral sex. If oral sex is ok, but you fancy something more, try anal sex. Of course, this order is completely random and any couple who always use the missionary position can explore anal sex whenever they want. What matters is that you keep having fun.
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